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long long ago; /* in a galaxy far far away */

 //
    //                       _oo0oo_
    //                      o8888888o
    //                      88" . "88
    //                      (| -_- |)
    //                      0\  =  /0
    //                    ___/`---'\___
    //                  .' \\|     |// '.
    //                 / \\|||  :  |||// \
    //                / _||||| -:- |||||- \
    //               |   | \\\  -  /// |   |
    //               | \_|  ''\---/''  |_/ |
    //               \  .-\__  '-'  ___/-. /
    //             ___'. .'  /--.--\  `. .'___
    //          ."" '<  `.___\_<|>_/___.' >' "".
    //         | | :  `- \`.;`\ _ /`;.`/ - ` : | |
    //         \  \ `_.   \_ __\ /__ _/   .-` /  /
    //     =====`-.____`.___ \_____/___.-`___.-'=====
    //                       `=---='
    //
    //
    //     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    //
    //               佛祖保佑         永无BUG
    //

«Слава богу, багов нет»

#define TRUE FALSE //Happy debugging suckers


    //
    //	Dear maintainer:
    // 
    // Once you are done trying to 'optimize' this routine,
    // and have realized what a terrible mistake that was,
    // please increment the following counter as a warning
    // to the next guy:
    // 
    // total_hours_wasted_here = 42


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// Magic. Do not touch.

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Коммент к AngularJS.

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Коммент к исходникам Quake III Arena.

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view-source:http://theoatmeal.com/

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Резюме Сергея Брина

/* Stupid CSS hack because IE sucks */

На сайте microsoft.com

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На сайте Amazon.com

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На сайте Amazon.com

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Welcome to Flickr — Photo Sharing

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Home of the Mozilla Project

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Flipkart

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    .
                             _
     _._ _..._ .-',     _.._(`))
    '-. `     '  /-._.-'    ',/
       )         \            '.
      / _    _    |             \
     |  a    a    /              |
     \   .-.                     ;  
      '-('' ).-'       ,'       ;
         '-;           |      .'
            \           \    /
            | 7  .__  _.-\   \
            | |  |  ``/  /`  /
           /,_|  |   /,_/   /
              /,_/      '`-'


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"...just crawl it."

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MS-DOS Operating System:

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Source: Farts and f-bombs: see the hidden jokes in Microsoft's early code

Запись в .EXE file:

If you can read this, you too could become a great hacker!

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Source Code of SpankBang

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Вебсайт анимэшки.

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    /** 
    * For the brave souls who get this far: You are the chosen ones, 
    * the valiant knights of programming who toil away, without rest, 
    * fixing our most awful code. To you, true saviors, kings of men,
    * I say this: never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, 
    * never gonna run around and desert you. Never gonna make you cry,
    * never gonna say goodbye. Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you. 
    */

    //When I wrote this, only God and I understood what I was doing 
    //Now, God only knows

// Autogenerated, do not edit. All changes will be undone.

// sometimes I believe compiler ignores all my comments

    // I dedicate all this code, all my work, to my wife, Darlene, who will 
    // have to support me and our three children and the dog once it gets 
    // released into the public.

// drunk, fix later

    Catch (Exception e) {
     //who cares?
    }

    
/* 
 * You may think you know what the following code does. 
 * But you dont. Trust me. 
 * Fiddle with it, and youll spend many a sleepless 
 * night cursing the moment you thought youd be clever 
 * enough to "optimize" the code below. 
 * Now close this file and go play with something else. 
 */

    
//This code sucks, you know it and I know it. 
 //Move on and call me an idiot later.

// If this comment is removed the program will blow up 

//Dear future me. Please forgive me.
//I can’t even begin to express how sorry I am.

options.BatchSize = 300; //Madness? THIS IS SPARTA!

// I have to find a better job

// Catching exceptions is for communists

// Houston, we have a problem

// If I from the future read this I’ll back in time and kill myself.

// This is crap code but it’s 3 a.m. and I need to get this working


//Mr. Compiler, please do not read this.


B    FUBAR     # OK, I give up. Halt & take a dump!


/* don't ask, don't touch */


/* If you are reading this, I want you to know that I am probably on some kind of FBI watch-list because I googled “how to kill all children while leaving the parents alive”. So yeah, Linux is brutal */



    /*         ^          ^
     *		\______    ______/
     *       \  * \   / *   /
     *        -----   ------           /----\
     *              ||               -< Boo! |
     *             /__\                \----/
     *       \______________/
     *        \/\/\/\/\/\/\/
     *         ------------
     */



    /*
    This following code is a work of fiction. Variables, methods, classes and interfaces are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons's code, living, dead or in coma is purely coincidental.
    */



    /*
     *
     *   ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
     *
     *
     *              |    |    |
     *             )_)  )_)  )_)
     *            )___))___))___)
     *           )____)____)_____)\
     *         _____|____|____|____\\\__
     *---------\                   /---------
     *  ^^^^^ ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
     *    ^^^^      ^^^^     ^^^    ^^
     *         ^^^^      ^^^
     *
     *
     */


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// somedev1 - 6/7/02 Adding temporary tracking of Login screen
     // somedev2 - 5/22/07 Temporary my ass .


//If you have reached here, you're probably doing something wrong. 


//Increase the counter when you have tried hard to optimize this code and failed. 
    //total_hours_wasted=21


// No comments, as it was hard to code, it should be hard to understand.


//f**k the customers. 


/* Please work */


 //Hey John, please fix the errors. 
    //Hey Abraham, please fix the errors. 
    //Abraham says F**k you both .


    /*
    The CEO of the company (and my former boss) sold the company
    leaving me free to comment the code as I should have. The 
    former CEO of the company will be referred  to as Dip Shit, or DS for short.
     
    DS thinks he is a software developing genius. Unfortunately for
    me (the maintenance programmer) I spent too much time cleaning
     up Dip's Shit.
    DS is a daredevil developer. Like Evel Knievel his code uses
     the GOTO statement frequently jumping daringly from a code 
    module into the middle of an IF...THEN structure in a different 
    module that has nothing to do with the first module.
    Speaking of IF structures DS loves them. He has no idea what a 
    CASE or SWITCH logic block is. Instead, I get to play code 
    archaeologist, and dig though a massively nested (and un-
    indented) IF...THEN...ELSE logic blocks.
     
    DS thinks of himself as clever, and this shows though with the 
    variable names he chooses:
     
      global i=0;
      global dateMyWife = 1;
      datesAreAFruit = '12/12/98';
      giveDatesToMyWife = datesAreAFruit + dateMyWife;
      if (someStuid)
      {
        giveDatesToMyWife = false;
      }
     
      // Ryan. Why does this sometimes crash? 
      if (giveDatesToMyWife) goto :hotTub 
     
      // Well, DS because you changed giveDatesToMyWife data type, 
    (also, adding an integer to the string -- which the compiler 
    warned you about)... Anyway in a weakly typed language you 
    obtained drain bramage by conditionally changing the data type 
    from a string to a Boolean, so that when the 
    if(giveDatesToMyWife) executes, when the variable is a string 
    the program correctly crashes -- because a string is not a 
    conditional bool type. Also, since someStuid is global, the 
    invisible pink unicorn only knows where this value is set, or 
    where and in what modules it gets changed.
     
    DS only knows how to scope variables as global. Stating when he  
    "tried using local, or private, my programs would always error 
    with variable not found error, so it's just easier to make 
    everything a global."
     
    I could go on, but as you dig though this flying-spaghetti-
    monster nightmare code you will see what I mean.
    */


    var c = 0,
    	safeCounter;
    ...
    safeCounter = function () {
          ...
          c++; // this is not subliminal
          ...
    },
    ...


    int x; 				// x is an int
    int y; 				// y is an int
    int z; 				// z is an int
     
    /* more code here ... */
     
    if (x)				// do something here
    	return x;
    else if (x == 0) 	// do something else here
    	return y;
    else				// do something entirely different
    	return z;


Коммент в исходниках VMWare:
//This exception should never happen, if it does gods help us.


И все же ЭТО однажды случилось, и бог не помог...

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Has the Large Hadron Collider destroyed the world yet?

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Исходники Apollo 11

И напоследок, крик души:


    # Stop using anal as a variable! 
    # Wherever I look I see anal this and anal that!
    # So please stop.
    # Use analyze or xbvvzr or whatever and not anal_insert or anal_check

P.S.


// I'm sorry.
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